However you want to say it, I'm near the end. Part of me can't believe that I've gone through ten treatments of chemo. Another part of me believes it and says, "Let's get this done!"
The last treatment was pretty normal, aside from a little issue with the port. That pesky port - I love the thing because I don't have to get poked, but I hate the thing when it acts up. There's really no reason why it acts up, the nurses say that this sometimes happens. Leave it to me to be the problem patient. When they can't get a blood return on the port, I end up going through a series of different motions and such to get the return. Try back in the chair. Okay, now lean forward. And now lift up one of your arms. Try turning your head. With your head turned, now cough. This ends up being simultaneously humorous and frustrating. It reminds me of trying to get a clear station on the TV with rabbit ears antenna. Maybe if I hold a position just so, the blood will be flowing.
Mickey sat with me again this time (Thanks, Mick!) and we had a good ol' time in the cancer center. It was weird because both times in a row that she came with me, she experienced no bad weather on her drive in, some snow on Friday, and then an uneventful drive home on Saturday. I'm glad for all of that because weather here can be so unpredictable and sketchy.
Which brings me to my next item - we have a snow day today! Finally a legitimate one that I can enjoy. Can you believe that the two others we've had this year were on chemo Mondays? As I said in my earlier post, I really felt gypped with that first one, and the second one was the same. This one, however, had all the sweetness of a snow day - the wondering, the anticipating, the planning, the sleeping. I actually used this morning to get a jump start on my report cards. I also went to lunch with my sister-in-law Anne and Eric and Mia. Now I'm catching up on the blog and things around the house. And I'll wrap up the afternoon by throwing some pulled pork in the oven for dinner.
Having said that, I am really looking forward to spring and a change in the seasons. In Michigan this can be far off in the distance, but I'm ready. I'm ready for lighter clothes, walking outside without tensed neck muscles, and sunlight later than 6:00. A girl can dream.
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Monday, February 18, 2013
Catching Up
Now. Where was I? Oh, let's just catch up.
We just got back from a weekend catching up with all sorts of people. Friday night we went into Chicago and met some friends from Michigan for dinner. I joked that we had to travel to Chicago to meet up for dinner. We also met up with some family from Stein's side (at dinner and after). The funny thing looking back, is that we never saw anyone from my family. Huh. And I was the one who grew up there!
Anyway, Saturday, we headed up to Milwaukee for our annual trip to see friends and catch a Marquette basketball game. It's always a fun time for us, because a lot of these friends we never see until this event. I love it because in the midst of the longest-shortest month of February, we get to break it up and do this. The only thing missing this time was Chris. It didn't feel the same without her there. Although we improvised - our friend Sandy made a "Flat Chris" that could be brought to the game and out with us afterward. So even though Chris is in London, her flat version will be able to keep up with what's happening here. Brilliant.
Throw into all this planning and traveling: a couple busy weeks of school, Stein's birthday, and not to mention Valentine's Day and the start of a week off. I dreaded Valentine's Day (as all teachers do), but was pleasantly surprised by the day we had. My kids were great and we had a good time.
In the spirit of catching up, I also need to catch you all up on the cancer stuff. I had a doctor's appointment a little over a week ago, and he delivered some good news. The results from the PET scan showed that the tumors are shrinking. He had a big smile on his face when he came into the room to tell us. I have 3 more treatments to go. Nine down! Once those are done, I will have another PET scan (Yay! More yucky goop to drink!) and that will determine whether or not I will have to get radiation. In my doctor's words, "We'll see if there is any residual cancer that may need to be mopped up with radiation." I instantly thought, 'Mopped up'? Like there's a cancer spill in aisle nine? I laughed as my sister-in-law Anne and I took it a little further and exchanged texts on the subject.
So. There you have it. Things are moving along, good news has been received, and now I have a week off. It always feels so decadent at the beginning of a week off. The possibilities are endless. Hope all is well in your world!
We just got back from a weekend catching up with all sorts of people. Friday night we went into Chicago and met some friends from Michigan for dinner. I joked that we had to travel to Chicago to meet up for dinner. We also met up with some family from Stein's side (at dinner and after). The funny thing looking back, is that we never saw anyone from my family. Huh. And I was the one who grew up there!
Anyway, Saturday, we headed up to Milwaukee for our annual trip to see friends and catch a Marquette basketball game. It's always a fun time for us, because a lot of these friends we never see until this event. I love it because in the midst of the longest-shortest month of February, we get to break it up and do this. The only thing missing this time was Chris. It didn't feel the same without her there. Although we improvised - our friend Sandy made a "Flat Chris" that could be brought to the game and out with us afterward. So even though Chris is in London, her flat version will be able to keep up with what's happening here. Brilliant.
Throw into all this planning and traveling: a couple busy weeks of school, Stein's birthday, and not to mention Valentine's Day and the start of a week off. I dreaded Valentine's Day (as all teachers do), but was pleasantly surprised by the day we had. My kids were great and we had a good time.
In the spirit of catching up, I also need to catch you all up on the cancer stuff. I had a doctor's appointment a little over a week ago, and he delivered some good news. The results from the PET scan showed that the tumors are shrinking. He had a big smile on his face when he came into the room to tell us. I have 3 more treatments to go. Nine down! Once those are done, I will have another PET scan (Yay! More yucky goop to drink!) and that will determine whether or not I will have to get radiation. In my doctor's words, "We'll see if there is any residual cancer that may need to be mopped up with radiation." I instantly thought, 'Mopped up'? Like there's a cancer spill in aisle nine? I laughed as my sister-in-law Anne and I took it a little further and exchanged texts on the subject.
So. There you have it. Things are moving along, good news has been received, and now I have a week off. It always feels so decadent at the beginning of a week off. The possibilities are endless. Hope all is well in your world!
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
Before and After Cancer
Can I just vent for a minute? I'm feeling overwhelmed, and not with the cancer stuff. This week has been/will be crazy and it's only Tuesday. I have a meeting at school tomorrow during the morning that will put me out of my room for at least an hour. Tomorrow after school I'm getting re-certified in CPR. Thursday morning I'm having blood drawn and then I have a doctor's appointment. Thursday afternoon I'm being observed by my principal. Not to mention Friday chemo and Monday chemo recovery which will require more sub plans to be written.
Anticipating and planning for all of this has made me exhausted already. I feel like actually going through all of this won't be as exhausting. I'm trying to be as organized as possible so that every little bit of the plans gets done. I'm trying to be proactive. Just as soon as I get this post written. Ahem.
Okay, enough with my schedule. There have been other things on my mind lately as I approach the end of my treatment stint. I've been thinking about what kind of "legacy" I want to leave on this whole experience. What have I learned, that I can pass on to others? What can I do to help others who will go through the same adventure?
Before cancer, I thought that I was immune to the whole thing. There is very little history of cancer in my family. And really, besides some heart issues, there's not a whole lot that I thought was worrisome. Before cancer, I was in relatively good health, ate healthy foods most of the time, and tried to get some regular exercise. At the same time I thought I was immune, I also gave a sigh of relief that it wasn't me when someone would tell me about a friend or family member who had cancer.
I did notice that a lot of people who have had cancer do something "for the cause". Some people have started foundations. Others have become spokespeople for research. Some people have written books about diets that focus on staying healthy and cancer-free after treatment. Others have raised money for foundations or research.
I almost feel pressured to find the lesson in this whole thing, and to think about a way that I can do something "for the cause". Although, I'm not sure what that something is. I've written about the lesson that someone has been trying to teach me about letting go, not sweating the small stuff, and quitting thinking I can control everything. Oh, and did I mention the lesson about letting people help? And the lesson about the importance of friends and family and their support?
So the lessons have been presented, and some have been learned better than others. Some are a work in progress. Some may take a lot longer to learn.
I've been thinking about two things that I would like to do in response to this experience. One is that I would like more people, especially primary physicians, to know about all of the symptoms of Hodgkin's, specifically the alcohol-related one I experienced. I was lucky that one of my tumors eventually grew out of my chest and led to my diagnosis. What if it hadn't? Would I still be going along drinking alcohol, experiencing the burning feeling in my shoulder and arm, thinking it was nothing? Who knows. Maybe I would eventually get some more "typical" symptoms that would lead me to go get things checked out. But by then the cancer could've advanced even further.
Another thing that I would like to suggest or even have a part in doing is a sort of program for linking up people who have gone through treatment with people who are currently going through treatment. Those people could offer one-to-one support either in person or over the phone or computer. Yes, there are support groups and websites and online support boards, but I think a person who has already gone through what you have gone through and who is available would be great. That person could possibly come to chemo occasionally to check in, and answer any questions that should come up.
Just some thoughts. Some of many as I continue to feel my way through this craziness.
Anticipating and planning for all of this has made me exhausted already. I feel like actually going through all of this won't be as exhausting. I'm trying to be as organized as possible so that every little bit of the plans gets done. I'm trying to be proactive. Just as soon as I get this post written. Ahem.
Okay, enough with my schedule. There have been other things on my mind lately as I approach the end of my treatment stint. I've been thinking about what kind of "legacy" I want to leave on this whole experience. What have I learned, that I can pass on to others? What can I do to help others who will go through the same adventure?
Before cancer, I thought that I was immune to the whole thing. There is very little history of cancer in my family. And really, besides some heart issues, there's not a whole lot that I thought was worrisome. Before cancer, I was in relatively good health, ate healthy foods most of the time, and tried to get some regular exercise. At the same time I thought I was immune, I also gave a sigh of relief that it wasn't me when someone would tell me about a friend or family member who had cancer.
I did notice that a lot of people who have had cancer do something "for the cause". Some people have started foundations. Others have become spokespeople for research. Some people have written books about diets that focus on staying healthy and cancer-free after treatment. Others have raised money for foundations or research.
I almost feel pressured to find the lesson in this whole thing, and to think about a way that I can do something "for the cause". Although, I'm not sure what that something is. I've written about the lesson that someone has been trying to teach me about letting go, not sweating the small stuff, and quitting thinking I can control everything. Oh, and did I mention the lesson about letting people help? And the lesson about the importance of friends and family and their support?
So the lessons have been presented, and some have been learned better than others. Some are a work in progress. Some may take a lot longer to learn.
I've been thinking about two things that I would like to do in response to this experience. One is that I would like more people, especially primary physicians, to know about all of the symptoms of Hodgkin's, specifically the alcohol-related one I experienced. I was lucky that one of my tumors eventually grew out of my chest and led to my diagnosis. What if it hadn't? Would I still be going along drinking alcohol, experiencing the burning feeling in my shoulder and arm, thinking it was nothing? Who knows. Maybe I would eventually get some more "typical" symptoms that would lead me to go get things checked out. But by then the cancer could've advanced even further.
Another thing that I would like to suggest or even have a part in doing is a sort of program for linking up people who have gone through treatment with people who are currently going through treatment. Those people could offer one-to-one support either in person or over the phone or computer. Yes, there are support groups and websites and online support boards, but I think a person who has already gone through what you have gone through and who is available would be great. That person could possibly come to chemo occasionally to check in, and answer any questions that should come up.
Just some thoughts. Some of many as I continue to feel my way through this craziness.
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